Thoughts on Sexual Sobriety

I don’t do this too often, but today I want to share on this blog something I wrote in my personal journal.  I started journaling over two years ago as a recovery tool and initially I really did not like it and resisted doing it.  Everyone in my recovery circle though was talking about how helpful it was to write down their struggles and insights into their own lives.  I relented and finally started to journal, and was very inconsistent with it, but something told me to keep trying.  Eventually, I actually began to enjoy the writing process and found it very helpful in spotting patterns in my life, positive or negative.   There is something about seeing something in print that makes it very real and makes it difficult for me to run from.  Writing about myself forced me to think more thoughtfully about the things I think, do, and say.

Anyway, yesterday marked four years of continuous sobriety for me.  I try not to view it as something to be proud of, but rather as a reason to give thanks and praise to God for His faithfulness in my life.  So, to You Lord, I give thanks today for performing a work in me quite frankly that I never really believed would ever happen.  You did it on Your terms, in Your way, in order to bring You glory.  I see every day how You are using my life and testimony to minister to others, and how You are using others to minister to me.  Please give me a heart that earnestly seeks You and reaches out to others with Your message of hope, forgiveness, and love.

This morning, a friend in my accountability group meeting reminded all of us there that Jesus said His “…yoke is easy and His burden is light.”  That verse implies that the work of God in my life is a two-way street; that there is God’s part, and there is work for me to do in my recovery.  I know that part of that work for me has been to come to Him in repentance and to begin meeting with others as a community of God’s people and openly sharing my struggles so that I can receive prayerful support and healing through that process.  I also know that I must commit my life to His care each and every day as a deliberate act of my will.  It is truly a journey that is taken one day, one step, and one moment at a time.

I thank God for my sobriety, but much more, I thank Him for the growing relationship I have with Him.  To God be all the glory!